Fears and Phobias…

Well, after reading about ghost stories and weird encounters, I thought it was the right time to share my fears. I am scared of many things, but when faced with it I try to overcome it! Some fears I got because of personal encounters and others because I  always have this intuition and feeling in my stomach before I do something.

So  here we go:

1- Heights.

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I am just so scared of heights! When im just even a few meters off the ground i begin to feel super dizzy and sick. If i even look down for a second , my next move is to hold something stable or lean back against a wall. I begin to freak out hallucinating and imagining what it would feel like falling from where I am. Ughh , hate it even more if someone jokingly slightly pushes/ hits me around a high place, when i stable i will murder them. This explains why i did not go up the Eiffel Tower when I visited France.

2- Silence


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 I am a person with a wide imagination  and cannot stand sitting alone in silence. When i am alone i start using my senses very intently. I start hearing things and feeling things around me I don’t usually pay attention to normally. When I  move from room to room, my heart pounds in fear. I try to convince myself that there is nothing because i am the only person in the house , but i do believe in the super natural and i let my imagination go wild.

3-Shadows and the Dark

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You know at night when you are sitting in bed and have a little side lamp on that shines on things…yeah.. I always see shadows of faces or skeletons… i blink a few times and dim the light so i don’t see as well. I scare the shit out of myself…. >.> I also cannot have lights off as I navigate around anywhere… i start to she shapes in the dark.

4- Talking to someone with their back to me

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Ok i probably have never shared this one before, but here we go. If you talk to someone i would most likely either ask them to turn around when talking to me or i have to stand in front of them. I always have this fear that when they turn around , they will have something wrong with them, or suddenly turn into something… like a monster or demon or such or even with a creepy face….

5- Fear of being imperfect

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I can never ever get over something that i see imperfect in my eyes. If im writing an essay and i mess up a word and it messes the looks of the paper, I will instantly rip up the paper and start all over again. If something isnt in the right angle , not straight , even when someone miss pronounces a word, something inside me awakens and i have to correct what is wrong. I fear this because it has slowed down my progress in school, i never tried because i didnt want to end up doing something wrong. My teacher would always tell my parents that i needed to make more mistakes in order to make progress, but i just can’t.

6- Being watched / followed

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I was once at the super market with my mum, it was a crowded day there and i usually take the role of pushing the trolley around. My mum went off to grab some things ahead of me while i was caught up in a crowd pushing they trolley when i felt someone was watching me. I turned around and i glimpsed a man , but then i convinced myself that i was just imagining. As i walked I felt someone very close to me, they touched my lower back. I turned around and there was..no one. I got really scared and caught up with my mum. I told her and she said someone must have bumped into me, but it didnt feel like that ! A few minutes later we moved into an emptier aisle and as i looked back , i still felt someone was watching me….

7- Claustrophobia

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Fear of being trapped in a small place. It gets worse when im in an elevator especially if i am with other people. I start to sweat and think what would happen if we got stuck. I can’t handle myself freaking out, what about the others with me. Id scream at the top of my lungs.

8- That dream

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You know when you are sleeping and fell that you are on a high place and just suddenly fall down and hit the ground. In reality you also hit the bed then wake up. I always get it , and i wake up panting or shrieking because it always feels very real to me.

I also have had numerous dreams of me being chased by a killer , who is running after me all through the dream and im not much of a runner. Im usually screaming “What do you want from me?!” then i wake up when they get me or i manage to escape.

I had another dream where i was with family in a room , with this doll on the desk in that room. Everytime they turned away the doll would get up and move. I would shout for them to look but they would just accuse me of being crazy and no one would believe me at all. This continued till the doll was walking out the room and i woke up.

9- Spider and insects

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A common fear really , but if i see/ touch/ feel an insect i will leave everything and go to shower or sit in another place till its gone. I will constantly get the felling that the insect is on/crawling on my body and i will start twitching and i look super weird.

10- Being excluded.

ImageThis is my worst fear. That one day i will not have any friends or my family will reject me for some reason. I always try to fit in and not show the things i feel towards others sometimes so i don’t seem weird to others. I try my best to be nice to everyone, even people i do not really like. People on the other hand have always disappointed me and used me or lied to me. Anywho i just hope i don’t ever become excluded.

So, there are just a few thing i thought i would share… Feel free to share any of your if you feel like. Sorry for such a long post but it takes quite a while to get people to understand me, as i tend to talk be hard to get sometimes x3

Hope you haven’t slept from all my talking, hahahah.

(If you are here , you are awesome and you can have a cookie!)

-Alice//Cookie

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