Torture

  

  This picture refects how I feel. 

Knowing that someone is causing her pain because she feels it, however refuses to acknowledge who is causing it by closing her eyes. Even though she deep down knows who it is. It’s complicated. She doesn’t hold grudges, she lets out her pain to be lost in the universe hoping that one day it would be forgotten.

This is my first time drawing how i feel, so I’m pretty happyy. I’m not sure how it happened. I just suddenly had a picture in my head that i needed to get out. 

  
Up on my wall with Alkina. Its quite small, but it was a doodle so its okaay. I’ll share my wall soon but when it looks prettier since I’m gonna DIY more wall decorations other than my drawings. 

~

-Panda/Deww

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Body Shaming

I don’t think I’ve seen something break people more than body shaming. Its so sad and disgusting that people find the need to shame a type of body to highlight a certian type. Is it so hard for people to accept the fact that beauty doesn’t have a “model shape”? Its not an exam where you have mode answers to it wtf. I think it was last year that I saw the contestants for Miss Korea and they all looked the same. People were shocked and acted like this is unnatural. It is natural when you give someone “goals” and tell them you have to have that to be beautiful. 

  
Saying that “being skinny is ugly and real woman have curves” to make curvy woman feel happy about there body but at the same time telling skinny people that they’re ugly and not “real” just because their body type is different. 

  
A confession I saw earlier.

Omg the horrid shit that was told to her. People just forget that others do have feelings? She’s always crying because people told her no one will ever love her. Their words have affected her this bad. Why? Why the need to step on someone to make yourself feel better? No you’re not “beautiful” or “real” if you find the need to shame others in order to feel better about yourself. 

     

   Also judging have became like a second nature for some people. SOME PEOPLE JUDGE BY HOW HIGH YOUR HEELS ARE! Gladely this has never happened to me and if someone decided to judge me by how tall my heel is I’ll stick it up their butt then call them a whore for having shoes up their butt -.- isn’t it the same thing they did? They made measures that classify “what you are” and forced them on you. Utterly disgusting. 

I feel like one person makes up an idea – in this situation that woman have to be curvy to be considered femine and pretty tO BE LOVED  and then people jusy blindly cover and not stopping for a second to think about how this might affect others. One girl decided to anonymously talk about how this affects her and how she prefers to stay at home because going out scares her. Isn’t this like torturing someone? Keeping them alive but not killing them. Just distroying them. Judging should be illegal one day, hopefully soon. 

Anyway. Ending this post with a happier subject. 

 This was Alice and I in 2013
  This is us now as of 2015

Alice didn’t change much, just her eyebrow game got stronger, but look at me O.O’ so different >.<

  
Lollipop of out childhood ;__; the memories that come with the taste. 

 
🌙Picture of the moon yesterday and of course the stars are photoshopped inn xD
 -Panda/Deww

Ramadan🌙Kareem Art

I’ve been wanting to draw something Ramadan Inspired since Ramadan started but could barely come up with an idea. I just kept doodling stuff then I’d rip them out of my sketch and feel like a failure. Art has a great impact on my mood. It manages to make me feel the most worthless piece of shit ever and the most talented person ever I could be Picasso wtf. No inbetween. 

 

Alkina🌙


 I usually either let Alice or Ahmad name the girls I draw. I send them the picture and who ever answers first with a name wins. Ahmad won this time but I ended up naming her anyway wtf xD I wanted a moon-related name so I googled names. 
I imagined her while I was in the car going to a family gathering after my previous ideas managed to make me feel disappointed in myself. I imagined her a bit differently though, I pictured the moon laying under her eyes – like how Sailor Moon’s moon looks like however not on her forehead, but after drawing it I didn’t really like it. 
I used Pastel Pitt pencils to colour her and random pens to outline her. 
I’m not exactly sure why I drew her as an anime, I prefer realism. Also I suck at drawing anime. I think I improved a lot. 
Anyway, yesterday was my mum’s birthday. First we went to an Iftar with the family which not a lot of people attended this year.  


I really loved how my makeup looked like. The eyeliner came out pretty good which was a surprise since the brush wouldn’t work properly -.- 

I used The Body Shop’s Liquid Eyeliner in black. Its been my favourite eyeliner for a really long time, doesn’t budge until you rub it with water. For eyeshadow, I used The Body Shop’s Eye Colour Matte in no.10 which is a pretty neutral brown colour. I applied it only on my crease and blent it above it because my eyes are deep set and  it doesn’t show eyeshadow if i don’t blend it above. For mascara, my all time favourite is Miss Manga by L’Oreal.

 
Full face. 

  Mum’s birthday cake xD the only candle that was available was a Minnie Mouse 1 year old candle wahahahahhaha
That’s all for now ^__^ buh byee!

-Panda/Deww 

WIP: “Honey you’re a diamond” 💎 art + Video

I drew this a while ago but never got around to finishing it because I started it during exams >.< totally forgot about them until today. Just added some writing ^_^


I made two of these. First one was a tester, to see how it would look like and the other was made specially for Cookie.

 This was the first one I made. It is softer and lighter.

 

{no flash}

This one is for Cookie, its much darker and vivid than the first, I like it more (≧∇≦)

 

{Flash}


Side by side.

 “Honey you’re a 💎”

It really looks pretty on my wall, its nice to look at.

That’s it for now,  I think I should get back to drawing again. I really like water colours so I want to get better at it.

 

-Panda/Deww

I want to be a Mermaid.

^Don’t we all?

ariel bubbles

When I was a kid, my favourite Disney princess was (and still is) Ariel. I remember those times when I prayed for God to turn me into a Mermaid wahahhahaha I believed that I could somehow turn in to a mermaid. The thought of dying in a “human form” was completely impossible to me for some reason.

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However I don’t recall dreaming about a prince. I fell in love with mermaids, not the love story. I’m pretty much the opposite of Ariel, while she is fascinated by humans, I’m fascinated by mermaids. Ariel never really wanted a prince until he came along. He was like the cherry on top of her cupcake. Even in the original story, she was fascinated by humans, but wanted to become an immortal soul. When she saw the prince she decided to settle for humans though later she learnt that humans are assholes and died, which made her reborn as an immortal soul.

I loved how in Once Upon a Time they split Arial’s character into two. Ariel was the one that fell on love with a prince (on the left) and the other part named Ursula – after the Goddess of the sea – loved humans. I really enjoyed how OUAT connects all fairy tales with dark twists.

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I drew this mermaid last year, I think it was the first time for me to use watercolours. When I’m drawing or painting my talent is either majestic like in the pic above or I cant frickin’ draw lamp for the life of me. There is no in between.

Last year, I dyed my hair red to feel like a mermaid, I really loved it, but it wrecked my hair TT_TT I’m still recovering of how much of my hair fell so I never redyed it. I loved how much attention it got me, random girls stopped me to compliment it and my family excluding my dad kept commenting on how they’ve never seen someone looks better with dyed hair than their original hair colour. I honestly plan on redying when its in a better condition even though Alice’s mum might kill me for it XD she’s done quite a job returning my hair to its’ original colour.

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Strawberry head

Funny story: I was once stopped by a bald guy to ask me what colour my hair was XD and he couldn’t pronounce the “r”s so he would just repeat “Chewwy wed?” when I said “Cherry Red”.

-Panda/Deww